Last modified: Sunday, November 28, 2004 12:50 AM EST Tough love BY GLORIA LaBOUNTY / SUN CHRONICLE STAFF When a new food pantry opened in Seekonk three years ago, the idea was to help people get through a crisis. Gradually, the volunteers saw that some of the people continually needing services were not attempting to make any changes in their lives. `` We decided that what we need to do is to help people help themselves,'' said Kathy Harms, the director of the Doorways food pantry. Now the pantry has become a program that requires clients to be responsible. Many of them rebound on their own after getting some help, Harms said, but those who don't are expected, after the first year, to either work on improving their lives, or to give back to the program by volunteering. Harms calls it a hand-up rather than a hand-out. `` If we don't make people accountable, we have done nothing,'' Harms said. It's the kind of `` tough-love'' approach that is being adopted by a number of local agencies and churches who want to assist the homeless and the needy, but who also expect some effort in return so their limited funds are not going to the same people with no end in sight. Many of them are joining forces to avoid duplicating services, and to work cooperatively to get clients into programs that help them get homes, jobs, skills and some measure of independence. Sparked by new data on the growing number of families that can't make ends meet, the Attleboro Area Homeless Coalition last week called an emergency meeting of churches, agencies and groups such as St. Vincent de Paul to coordinate efforts. Marilyn Godfrey, director of the United Way of Greater Attleboro-Taunton Info Line, urged them to funnel requests through her office so people in need can be given the most useful referrals and be helped in the most efficient and effective way. `` We are keepers of the list,'' Godfrey said of the range of information her office compiles. Godfrey is also looking for information herself. Her office is part of a federal effort to count the homeless and keep track of the services that individuals and families are getting or are lacking, data that may help local agencies qualify for grants. She is therefore urging churches, agencies and organizations to send information to her on the people they are serving. The United Way is also compiling a data base of programs in the area so the public can readily access information on the Internet. But a key goal of getting agencies to work together is to avoid duplicating services, and to prevent individuals from going from program to program seeking assistance without doing anything for themselves. The hope is to get at the root of the financial problems that forced people to seek help in the first place, and then to find them a better way. That case management approach is key, Godfrey said, because people without life skills will never be successful. It is also the key aspect of a $419,000 federal grant that the Attleboro Area Council of Churches is seeking to get people into apartments and into programs to help them lead more productive lives. By simply paying for someone to live in a rooming house, Godfrey said, `` We are not teaching them anything except how to come back. We are not teaching them how to get out.'' Dot Embree, the director of the council of churches and president of the Attleboro Area Homeless Coalition, will call the grant-funded program `` Homes with Heart,'' and hopes to hear next month if the money has been approved. If it is, she said the program should enable the council and the coalition to get anyone off the streets and into a place of their own if they want and accept the help. She estimates that more than two dozen people are homeless in the city, and are living under bridges, behind buildings, or in tents in the woods. `` The homeless population is getting pretty bad in Attleboro,'' Embree said. `` We have a population that is hurting.'' The council, she said, already has opened two shared living apartments -- one for men and one for women -- and is providing mentoring services so these individuals can improve their lives. Meanwhile, the homeless coalition has decided that opening an emergency shelter during bitterly cold weather is not a practical solution. It was an idea being considered by agencies and by the city council's public safety committee, but Embree said the cost for security guards and the need to staff the site with volunteers led the coalition to recommend otherwise. Instead, it hopes the city will support the coalition's efforts to raise more money to temporarily house the homeless in motels during frigid weather, and then to try to plug them into services. But there are also a number of people whom Embree calls `` gap individuals'' -- the ones who make too much money to qualify for government assistance, but not enough to live on and to care for their families. She told of a young father with three children who is trying to get by on pay of $400 a week -- $307 after deductions. The coalition helped him find an apartment in another community, lent him the first month's rent, and helped him get clothes, food and fuel assistance. He needed the help. His rent is $700 a month, and he brings home $1,200 for a family of four. `` He is scraping by,'' Embree said. A major problem, she said, is trying to find apartments for individuals and families who have the money either on their own or with the help of assistance programs, but who cannot find a place, often because rents are too high or because landlords do not want to rent to them. More landlords are needed who are willing to work with agencies, she said. `` We all have to get together to get the word out,'' Embree said at the recent meeting. At Doorways in Seekonk, homelessness is not as big an issue as it is in Attleboro, Harms said. Instead, she tends to see individuals and families who would become homeless if they did not get a safety net to catch them. Her program attempts to get them the help they need, and most of them eventually rebound, she said. Those who don't, she said, may want to help themselves but can't for various reasons, so they are asked to volunteer in the program while continuing to receive support. Others may want to improve their lives, but may not have the skills to do it, she said, so they are directed toward services like Doorways' `` GTS'' program that stands for `` Going Through Something.'' The pantry brings in experts to give seminars and one-on-one counseling on various topics like budgeting so clients can get the guidance they need. The next seminar will be Dec. 13 at 6:30 p.m., when a representative of the area Social Security office will give a talk at the pantry. A job fair is also being planned with the cooperation of local businesses. `` We want to deal with the reason they are getting to us,'' Harms said. The hope, she said, is to `` help people become empowered to make a difference in their lives.'' Doorways will only refuse to continue providing services if the person, after years of help, is unwilling to help themselves, Harms said. Part of the problem with that kind of approach, she said, is that people may simply go elsewhere for services, and that's why it's important for agencies and organizations to work together so no one will take advantage of available resources. It's also a controversial approach, and Harms said there have been some critics. But she said continuing to give handouts is like giving aspirin to treat chronic pain without treating the cause of the pain. Besides, she said, most people in need want to do better than going to a food pantry, and would rather be making their own choices at the grocery store and in their lives. But no one in need will ever be denied food, either in Seekonk or elsewhere, she said. At the six Food 'n' Friends kitchens sponsored in various communities by the Attleboro Area Council of Churches, no one is turned away. `` We welcome everyone,'' Embree said. The Working Person's Food Pantry in Hebronville requires patrons to show proof of employment, but many other food cellars are open to anyone, no questions asked. The council of churches also provides homeless individuals with `` comfort kits'' that contain a two-day supply of food, toiletries, a telephone card, a list of resources, and a train ticket to get to shelters in Boston. The kits are distributed by the police and fire departments and through the council of churches at 7 North Main St., Attleboro, and are available to churches and organizations that request them. The council can be reached at 508-222-2933. The United Way Info Line number is 508-223-4636. GLORIA LaBOUNTY can be reached at 508-236-0333 or at glabounty@thesunchronicle.com.