For those flying solo today, it may seem like one is the loneliest number, but it's time to liberate singles on this holiday reserved for love-sick couples. A lack of a significant other should no longer mean a lack of a happy Valentine's Day and there are plenty of options to help singles feel the love.

First and foremost, it should be remembered that the celebration of love isn't strictly for couples only. Why not celebrate how much you love your mother, or your best friend, or why not even celebrate how much you love yourself?

`` You have to fall in love with yourself before anyone will fall in love with you,'' said Kathleen Marvelli, a life coach who specializes in relationships and founder of Priorities Life Coaching in Norton. `` Define yourself by who you are, not who you're with.''

Marvelli urges singles to make Valentine's Day about themselves and the ones they love by planning their own special day. Singles can take themselves out for a day of shopping, a day at the spa, explore new hobbies or interests, or even stay in for a nice relaxing evening.

`` Give yourself the gift of what you want. What do you want to do to make yourself feel good that day?'' said Marvelli, who even suggests sending yourself a Valentine. Buying yourself a card that you would want someone to give you can be a great way to let yourself know what you want from a significant other, she said. If spending the day alone isn't appealing, spend it with someone you love. Go out to dinner with friends or have a movie night with them. Spend the night playing pool or kicking back with a few friends and some drinks.

Planning a party with friends or attending a party, even if it is a Valentine's Day theme, can be a great way to surround yourself with people you care about. While there may be couples attending the party, there will still be other singles, creating an environment to meet new people.

Along with giving yourself what you want, Marvelli suggests donating your time to someone else.

`` Do something that takes you out of your comfort zone but makes you feel good about yourself. Give yourself the gift of feeling good about who you are,'' said Marvelli.

Whether it be something as small as giving someone a compliment or sending someone a Valentine or something as big as volunteering at a local food pantry, giving yourself is a good way to make someone else's day feel special as well as make your own day.

This is how Marvelli preferred to spend her Valentine's Days when she was single. Taking out her mother or spending time with her friends, she said she always gave something on Valentine's Day, including sending a Valentine's Day card to one of her ex-boyfriends.

Reflecting upon all of the connections she has had in her life is important to her.

`` I never felt alone because I gave to others. If you practice that you'll see how you're not lonely,'' she said emphasizing that there is a difference between being alone and lonely.

Marvelli also suggests that people refocus what Valentine's Day is about. The holiday's over commercialization of gifts, cards and candy has led people off of the right track.

While there is nothing wrong with celebrating love for other people, Marvelli explained, there is too much emphasis based on Valentine's Day and expectations are too high, causing men to cringe as the day of love approaches each February. `` They kind of want to run away from it. They think, `this (gift) proves to her how much I love her.' They feel they will be judged by what they give,'' Marvelli explained.

By removing the pressures and the expectations, whether in a relationship or not, Valentine's Day will no longer need to be loathed by those with no clue of what to get their significant other and singles will no longer feel left out.

`` It's about celebrating love. Acknowledge the people you love today. Acknowledge love,'' said Marvelli. `` Where is there a written rule that you have to do something on Valentine's Day?''

Although being inundated with advertisements of candy, cards and flowers is inevitable, singles need not fret anymore at the thought of February 14th.

Who needs a Valentine anyway?

Stacey Perlman is an intern at the Sun Chronicle from Northeastern University. She can be reached at perlman.s(at)neu.edu