Well, I was so overwhelmed I didn't know what to do.

At the beginning of last weekend, I started to relate plans I had for the next few days.

They were all things to look forward to - lots of time with old friends and some fun new ones.

But as soon as I said them all out loud, I realized I would be going from one thing to another for, like, 72 hours.

Then I looked at my calendar and became aware that I've made some sort of social commitment for almost every weekend this summer. "Oh my gosh," I said to a co-worker. "I've got too many things to do!"

He gave me one of those, "Oh, if I only had that kind of problem" looks. You know, the really, "Are you serious?" downward stares.

I began to defend my sense of self, issuing rationale for being bothered that my life is so blessed, that I have so many wonderful friends, and family activities going on that I have not one moment to be bored, lonely or self-indulgent.

Oh, wait. I see. That was his point. Me, self-indulgent?

Well, heck yes.

So I worry about silly things.

Shoes are important to me. I hate it when I can't get a hair appointment when I need it.

I'm detailed enough that I once bought a new serving dish, the morning of a very small party, so I'd have it to match my other serving dishes.

I see nothing wrong with all that.

I realize that none of these little things matter much, or at all, to others. No one else's day is off to a bad start because I got chive cream cheese instead of a side of cream cheese with my bagel. But it's annoying, still, and just as much so as when that guy in front of you wouldn't go over 50 on the highway this morning or when your wife forgot to pick up your dry cleaning and there's a stain on your work shirt today.

I'm not without real worries, I assure you.

But I know that I'm blessed that there is actually room for self-indulgence, that I can take a couple of hours to relieve stress through reality TV, and that I'm fortunate that's all it takes.

I know how lucky I am that I have an afternoon to spend searching for the right pair of silver sandals.

So, sometimes I vent and forget.

Then I'm over the cream cheese thing.

So, my friends and I discuss how hard it is to find good jeans or where to get the best manicure.

And sometimes that irks those who think we're too self-indulgent.

So, go ahead and vent about it.

You might feel better.

And don't worry.

We know it really only matters what we think.

REBECCA KEISTER can be reached at 508-236-0336 or at rkeister@thesunchronicle.com.