Last modified: Tuesday, May 6, 2008 2:27 AM EDT NESI: Honor moms and peace Throughout the summer and fall of 1870, the great abolitionist and suffragette Julia Ward Howe looked on in horror as the armies of France and Germany slaughtered one another on the fields of Alsace-Lorraine, during the brief but brutal Franco-Prussian War. Reports of the carnage in Europe brought back painful memories of America's own Civil War, which had ended just five years earlier. "It seemed to me a return to barbarism, the issue having been one which might easily have been settled without bloodshed," Howe wrote later. "The question forced itself upon me, 'Why do not the mothers of mankind interfere in these matters, to prevent the waste of that human life of which they alone bear and know the cost?'" Howe - who, ironically enough, was also the author of the great martial anthem "Battle Hymn of the Republic" - decided to turn her thoughts into action. From her home in Boston, she sent out a proclamation calling on all mothers "to promote the great and general interests of peace." She had the document translated into French, Spanish, Italian, German and Swedish, and for two years she traveled far and wide to spread its message. As Howe neared the end of her journey, she began to think a day should be set aside each year to renew the commitment to nonviolence. "I had desired to institute a festival which should be observed as mothers' day, and which should be devoted to the advocacy of peace doctrines," she wrote. "I chose for that the second day of June, this being a time of year when flowers are abundant, and when the weather usually allows of open-air meetings." Thus, on June 2, 1872, Howe celebrated the first Mother's Day in Boston - a tradition that continued, both there and elsewhere, for a number of years thereafter. Americans will celebrate our modern Mother's Day this Sunday (you're welcome, forgetful sons and husbands) with a flood of flowers and fragrances. More than 84 percent of American adults plan to observe the holiday, the National Retail Federation reports, and the average consumer will spend $139 on Mom. But today's Mother's Day bears no resemblance to Howe's day of maternal activism in the interest of peace. Mother's Day as we know it dates to May 8, 1914. Nationalism was in the air, with Europe just months away from the catastrophe of World War I. President Woodrow Wilson, following Congress's lead, patriotically set aside May 8 in honor of "the service rendered the United States by the American mother." Since then, Mother's Day has become a sentimental celebration of Moms - their labor (of every sort), their sacrifices, and their importance in nearly all of our lives. Sunday, though, it would also be good to take a moment and reflect on Howe's vision of Mother's Day - particularly when the nation is at war, and Hillary Clinton, herself a mother, says America might "totally obliterate" the population of another nation. As of last Sunday - one week before Mother's Day - 4,060 American service members had died since the start of the Iraq war, according to the Department of Defense. At least 50 American soldiers were killed in April, making it the deadliest month since last September, when 65 died. Behind all of those numbers - 65, 50, 4,060 - are a great many brokenhearted mothers. None of them will ever be the same. "Arise, then, women of today!" Howe declared in 1870. "Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn / All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. / We, the women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country / To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs." After 138 years, Howe's vision still sounds like a distant dream. Is that because it is one, or only because we believe it is? TED NESI (tnesi@thesunchronicle.com) is a Sun Chronicle staff writer.