Last modified: Sunday, June 21, 2009 2:19 AM EDT An Apple iPod Touch BRISTOL: Gadgets and dads: A great combo for today It's Father's Day and I've been staring longingly at the newspaper ads for smart phones. They're so cool - the ads as well as the phones - with their colorful icons holding the promise of amazing apps that will enable me to do almost anything, possibly even read minds. Smart phones are the gadget of the moment and what guy doesn't love gadgets. If I had a smart phone I would have 24-7 access to my e-mail and all the world's news and Tweets from President Obama and text messages from my golfing buddies - like, "How did you possibly miss that two-foot putt for birdie?" I'm staring at the ads for smart phones because I didn't get one for Father's Day. Actually, I'm not disappointed; I'm relieved. I really don't need one. There's nothing in my e-mail that's urgent. Being retired, I don't have a boss who insists on being able to reach me any time anywhere. I don't use Twitter; I don't even text message. I can only imagine how much time I'm going to save not having to figure out how to work a smart phone. But they're so thin and sleek and flashy. I've got an older, unsmart phone and I'm barely smart enough to work that. It doesn't take pictures. It has numbers, not letters. Still, it has more features than I'll ever use. Once it was fairly cool, but today it doesn't measure up. It might as well be Maxwell Smart's shoe phone. From what I read, smart phones are fast becoming the accoutrement of the day. Having one identifies you as someone who must be important because you need to be connected wirelessly to the Web at all times. You know who the important people are because their return e-mails say, for instance, "Sent from my Verizon Wireless Blackberry." They catch up on their e-mail while waiting for a Grande Halfcaf Skim Milk No Whip Cream coffee while you have to do yours at home on your PC, with a mug of Lipton. I feel guilty that my phone skills are so primitive. I know these devices are the future. I see what's going on in Iran, with the TV networks relying on cell phone video and the political opposition using Tweets to stage massive demonstrations. I really should know all about this technology, I tell myself. But smart phones are so damn expensive. The big phone companies, once said to be economic dinosaurs, are raking in the bucks now. You no doubt saw in the news last week that a text message costs virtually nothing for phone companies to transmit, yet they charge 20 cents for a single one. If you don't want to pay per text, you can get a data/calling plan for, oh, $80 to $100 a month. That's why the phone companies are willing to sell smart phones at a loss, though they still cost a couple hundred bucks. Some deal. The phone companies love it that the smart phone is becoming a status symbol. Sales are way up and show no sign of slowing down, hence the plans of Research in Motion (maker of the Blackberry), Apple (released its latest iPhone Friday), Microsoft, Google, Palm and other companies to come out with new handsets and applications this year. Those smart phones will no doubt be even cooler than the ones of today - thinner, with clever new navigation, and more powerful cameras, better touch screens, with longer battery life - and software which if it doesn't read minds will probably make my computer obsolete. I can hardly wait for the Christmas ads. Not that I'll be looking for a smart phone in my stocking. NED BRISTOL is a member of The Sun Chronicle Editorial Board and a former editor of the newspaper.