I am excited to announce that my favorite and my least favorite show - "Lost" - is finally returning to ABC on Tuesday for its last season. I have loved and hated this show ever since I got my hands on the Season One DVDs and binge-watched all 25 episodes in the span of a couple days. Since then, I've been a devoted fan of the show and a sucker for all the secrets and plot twists that make the island such a fascinating place.

Despite my love for "Lost," I absolutely hate it when an episode ends with a cliffhanger and I have to count down the days until the next episode airs. Whether it's the shooting death of a major character, the opening up of a mysterious hatch, or a bomb exploding, I've never done so much yelling at the television (aside from sporting events, of course) than at those moments at the end of a "Lost" episode when I realize I'll have to wait an entire week before finding out who survived and who didn't.

So it is with both excitement and dread that I look forward to the start of the final season.

In case you're not up to speed on this roller coaster of a show, let me quickly recap some of the major plotlines for you. The show begins with a group of people on a tropical island, staggering around the beach amidst the wreckage of their airplane. These survivors - whose lives and histories we get to know intimately over the next few seasons - band together to treat their injuries, build shelters, find food, and maybe get a nice tan before they get rescued.

Pretty soon, however, it becomes dreadfully apparent that this tropical island is like no other. A polar bear attacks them. Evil people lurk in the jungle. A Subway franchise pops up out of nowhere and keeps everyone well-fed. Jack Shephard, the group's reluctant leader, makes it his mission to keep everyone safe and work on a plan to get rescued. Meanwhile, everyone else is suddenly busy with more important things. Charlie plays the guitar. Sawyer learns to read. Locke slowly goes crazy.

Trouble ensues when the "Others" attack and threaten the survivors. Fortunately, the gang is saved when Rupert fights them off in a blaze of tie-dye. Hilarity ensues when Mike "The Situation" and Snooki get into a fistfight at The Beachcomber. And a riot breaks out when the survivors realize they won't be reimbursed for their "Lost" luggage. This is especially frustrating since they'd paid an additional $35 fee for each checked bag.

Two weeks later the survivors all get letters from Oceanic Airlines apologizing for the unplanned diversion of their flight. Each letter comes with a fifteen-dollar voucher for use on a future flight. Hurley smears the vouchers with imaginary peanut butter and eats them for dinner.

In the final season we can expect to learn who finally makes it off the island, what happens to those who don't make it home, and how the survivors could possibly keep looking so attractive despite the lack of regular showers, soap, toothpaste, hair brushes, and deodorant. Once it's over, it will be a shame to have to live without "Lost." But it might be a lot less frustrating, too.

BILL ZUCK loves imaginary peanut butter. You can reach him at wcz78@yahoo.com.